When it rains, it pours…literally in my basement

Well not quite pours, but it’s a mess and the carpet and padding are drenched all around the area of our new pump. Yes, you heard me correctly, our new pump. The blinking green light says it’s fully operational. Fully operational and pumping water right out of the pipe seam and onto our carpeted basement.

A few months ago, we spent thousands of dollars putting in a system in our basement to try to stop the water leaks through the cinder block.  It was far more expensive than I imagined it would be, and we had to take out a loan to help cover the costs. But, at least we had the peace of mind to know there would be no more flooding of the basement and we could refinish it at our leisure… or so we thought.

The girls were having a sleepover last night in the basement. It thunder stormed for quite some time. But I wasn’t woken by the thunder. No, I was startled awake by tween girls freaking out. From their reaction you would have thought they had been swept up, carried downstream toward the waterfall, and were perilously close to plunging to their death. Not quite.

But it is a mess. The carpeted floor of the basement, all around the pump area, was soaked. Water was spilling out of a pipe seam as it was attempting to pump it out.

And, thus began my weekend. I was pulling up carpet and padding, mopping up water, and listening to stories of the ferocious water pump and subsequent flooding all before 7 am on a Saturday morning. What’s a sleep over without great stories, right?

What a mess! I’m a mom, a wife, a friend, a psychologist, a life coach… I’M NOT A PLUMBER!

How annoying and frustrating! Thousands and thousands of dollars and here I am mopping up water in my basement and ripping out padding!  I thought once we put in drains and a sump pump system I wouldn’t have to clean up any more flooding in our “used to be” finished basement.

Have you ever had something like that happen? You work really hard or spend a lot of money to “fix” something only to have it not work or worse yet, for it to feel like you are only going backwards. Last year, I had a nice finished basement with some water leakage and damp carpets in the corners when it rained. It was frustrating and a problem but it didn’t feel catastrophic. The de-humidifier was maintaining it.

But we decided to fix it. Because we didn’t want to pay the finishing costs on top of the insane costs of the project itself, we got the drain system installed, but we are going to eventually do all the finishing work ourselves. Meanwhile, our basement belongings are crammed to one side or stuffed in other places of our house. The lower half of the basement walls are all ripped out needing to be dry-walled and refinished and we have to replace the carpet that has been ripped up and out in some areas.

But today – add to all that mess I have hours of pipe water spraying and soaking into the room. It feels like, not only am I right back where we started, it’s worse.

Sometimes personal growth feels that way too. We become aware of something we want to improve and work on. Whether it’s a skill, an attitude, or a behavior – we are putting our efforts into learning, growing, and improving. We are doing the right things and looking forward to enjoying the success of our hard labors.

Only to find that something blips – it disrupts, bursts, or chokes. It seems like we are no better off than we were before we started. Maybe you’ve felt this way in your marriage, in your parenting, or at work. You’ve got skin in the game – you are doing the hard work – but things are still messy and some days feel worse than yesterday.

I feel that way sometimes. The emotions hit with discouragement, frustration, anger or even hurt and betrayal. I’ve done all this work, I’ve paid all this money, I’ve read all these books, it seems, for nothing.

I SOS messaged back and forth with the basement people with photos asking for help. After all that money, one would have hoped it would stay dry. But here I am with a waterfall. Why? Because one hose clamp hadn’t gotten tightened. Man, do I wish they had been more thorough.

As I worked to clean up the mess, I was angry and feeling taken advantage of. This whole project felt like a colossal failure. But now several hours later, the padding has all been pulled out, the water has been mopped up, and the fans and dehumidifier are drying out the carpet. I’ve tightened that clamp, plugged the pump back in, and no more leaking water. Hey, maybe I am a plumber!

A little thing made a big mess. But I was allowing that mess to become an even bigger mess in my mind. The project isn’t an abysmal failure. I didn’t really waste thousands and thousands of dollars. While I wish it had been a one and done. It wasn’t. It’s more of a journey just like the rest of my life.

How quickly I went from okay to colossal failure. I was frustrated, angry and ready to toss being a home owner.

Someone else’s mistake blew up my morning. Right or wrong that’s what it is. I can fight it – I can complain about them – I can be mad – I can be angry that it just seems like I can’t get a break. Trust me, I felt it all this morning.

– but –

I also need to keep moving forward and realize if I am intentionally working on myself, in the midst of all this, I am becoming better. I can’t control all that happens around me, but I can control me. It might not seem like it but I’m not the same person as I was yesterday because I am doing something to grow.

The basement “big” guy called. He owns the place. He was very apologetic. He is sending his crew back on Monday. He wants them to see what they missed, how it impacted the customer, and plan for how to do it better in the future.

Like me – they are a work in progress. They make mistakes too. They are learning and growing. I bet they never forget to double check their clamps in the future.

So, what am I reminded of this morning? Intentional growth doesn’t always have immediate rewards. Growth is a clunky process. There will be successes and failures. Sometimes we need to be kind to ourselves and to those in the thick of it with us. We need to guard our hearts and minds and remember this is an ongoing story. We need to keep growing and keep moving forward.

What are you aware of that you need to work on? What are you doing to nurture your growth in that area? Don’t be discouraged if it feels slow going or if you are hitting some pot holes. It’s not a one and done and it’s not an easy smooth path, but if you are looking forward and continuing to do things to help yourself grow, the results will come. Life is a journey filled with lots of opportunity to become a better you.

Let me know where you feel emotions or thoughts get you stuck so I can share about ways to get unstuck in future blog posts. Message me at sherri@renewgrowbecome.com