Our Lives Will Never Be The Same
Our lives will never be the same. Today’s post is much more personal than most. My mother-in-law, one of the sweetest, most joyful souls you could ever meet, was killed this week. My sister-in-law was abducted, taken away, harmed, and deeply traumatized. Our family is agonizing as the police continue to search for mom’s remains. All they are able to share at this time is that they know mom was killed as this horrific crime unfolded.
It was senseless and tragic. As far as we can tell, my sister-in-law’s soon to be ex-husband is responsible. My sister-in-law is blind because of chemo and end stage cancer. This man was gone for a while with no regard for her well-being and mom moved from out of state to go live with her to care for her. This man has deeply wounded our family with his heinous acts.
Words can’t begin to describe how horrible this has been for us all. My father-in-law is deeply grieving for his beautiful wife and trying to figure out how to help his daughter. My husband and his brother are trying to figure out how to care for their dad and sister while they themselves still cannot breathe or wrap their mind around how two of the most precious women in their lives were brutally victimized. The grandchildren are overwhelmed and scared. One of the most beautiful lights in their life, Grandma, is gone. Then there is this whole investigation, which is necessary, but by nature of the process, continues to traumatize us all. It’s so very hard.
Excruciatingly painful barely begins to describe the experience. While the rest of the world moves on, we wait struggling to breathe, searching for some footing, trying to figure out how to move forward from something so evil.
The solace we find is in our thoughts about mom. She was an incredible woman. She was born in Japan, the child of an American GI. As such, she was horribly mistreated in Japan. She grew up in orphanages and foster families. As a young teen, she hoped she would die rather than continue on. But she endured, and at age 16, she came to America with her younger siblings, who were born to another GI.
They lived with this man for a short time and even though she didn’t speak a word of English, she raised her siblings, went to school, and got a job. At 19, she met and married dad, and they worked to build a beautiful life. Together, they learned of Jesus and His saving grace. Mom knew she was loved by God and greater things were yet to come. Slowly, her broken life was transformed.
She turned her thoughts to God, His kindness, His compassion, and His love for her. Rather than dwelling on what wasn’t right in her world, she chose to focus on what could be with God by her side. She dreamed, she continued to grow herself, and she loved God passionately. She got herself through school, worked as a teacher at her kid’s school, and later became the senior manager at the credit union. She was strong, she was feisty, and she was an overcomer.
She raised three really great kids who became successful, caring adults. She has 5 beautiful grandchildren that she loved and adored beyond measure and who fiercely love her back. She planted a bush or tree in her yard each time a grandchild was born to honor their lives and their growth.
She adored flower gardens and grew beautiful flowers in every color. She was an artist at heart and appreciated color and beauty. All throughout the year, she sent us handmade beautiful cards expressing her love for us. She also had a beautiful voice, and despite being terrified of the stage, she did it anyway, and sang and praised the God she loved and adored.
Mom never let her thinking control her. She chose what thoughts she was going to dwell on, and she dreamed God sized dreams and took steps toward them despite her past, despite her fear, despite her hardships. She knew God had designed her for more. She knew God’s faithfulness and trusted His promises. Now she is resting, at peace in her heavenly father’s arms. We will miss you mom, but we will never forget you or how you have influenced our lives. We pray your amazing story of love, hope, and growth lives on through each of us.
Today’s leadership and personal growth lesson for us all – is to live out what mom’s life continually demonstrated. Don’t let your past experiences or your current circumstances determine your future. Don’t dwell on thoughts that don’t bring life. Dwell on thoughts that help you become more of who God designed you to be. Find your strength in God, and dream with Him about all that He desires for your future. Daily renew your mind, and take a step towards living out the amazing potential He has created within you. Choose daily to love the people around you and focus on what matters most.
10 Comments
Karen
I love this. I think Sachiko would be modest if she heard this all being said, but as well as wise and inspiring words, this is a great tribute to an amazing woman. ❤️
Anne Clements
What a beautiful legacy she leaves not only to her family but to others in her God filled determination and love. Prayers for Gods healing wings to shelter you and the entire family as you walk this very difficult path. May the Lord know the incense of our prayers and the dew of our tears for you all. In Jesus name.
CSpauld
What a beautiful tribute to your mother-in-law’s legacy. I will be praying for justice to be swift and for closure in the missing details of your MIL’s case. Thank you for sharing what a strong woman she was and how much she overcame! I’m glad those thoughts bring you some peace in the middle of this pain.
Linda Savage
Sweeter and truer words were never spoken 💕 my prayers and thought are with you, may we all hug our loved ones a little tighter, love with true unconditional love, a be quick to forgive! May God’s amazing grace surround you continually as you go thru each day! 💕
Patricia Kick
Sachiko was an amazing woman and no truer words can be said about her, Thank you for putting our thoughts into words. I pray she is brought home soon to her family.
Dawn Harrison
Sherri, what a beautiful tribute & such thoughtful & moving words! Everyone who knows Sachiko loves her, & knows what a special lady she is. I worked with both Sachiko & Julian for many years.
My husband unexpectedly died 6 years ago, so I have a small idea of what Jim is going through. However, my husband wasn’t senselessly murdered. It is unfathomable that someone like Norman could infiltrate your loving & beautiful family; much less do what he did.
Sachiko, your family & I share a very deep faith in Jesus. I have been in continuous prayer since I found out, & I will continue to do so. I asked God to carry your family, & to give you His strength, peace & love as you walk this unimaginable path.
Jenny
This is so beautifully written and honoring to your mother-in-law. Thank you for sharing your heart in the midst of your deepest grief and for reminding us of these incredibly powerful life lessons that can be learned by how she lived her life. Praying that you continue to find supernatural strength in God and keep dreaming as I am sure she would want you to do.
Monique Albritton
Wow! I’m seeing this post as a family member of a friend of your mother in law. I want the family to know that we are touched deeply by your family’s tragedy. We are praying for you all and for your sister in laws healing; body, soul and spirit. We serve a great and loving God and the why’s have to be one of those mysteries we won’t have all the answers to until we get to Heaven. I know that God will get the glory because the family loves God and God never allows suffering in vain. May you be filled with His love and peace and strength for the journey, in Jesus name.
Amy Klohn
A beautiful tribute to a beautiful person! She was always so kind and thoughtful. We love you all and are praying without ceasing ❤
Janet Cash
I have known Sachiko and Jeni since I began attending Hesperia Community Church back in 2002. I was experiencing major health set-backs and found a kindred spirit in Jeni, who was suffering from relapses of MS. Sachiko became my encourager and prayer warrior as I continued to deal with health issues. She was also Jeni’s champion and never ceased to stop praying for her. When Sachiko shared with me that Jeni’s cancer was terminal, she had such a peaceful and accepting attitude, I asked her to repeat what she had said in case I heard it incorrectly. Sachiko was a rare jewel and an incredible woman of God. She and Jim worked tirelessly behind the scenes for years preparing the snacks and coffee for our after-church fellowship time. Sachiko even came forward when our children’s ministry director expressed a need for Sunday School helpers.
I was reading through our church’s prayer chain recently, and came across a prayer request from Sachiko a little over a month ago asking for prayer for Norman. Though he was her ex son-in-law had essentially abandoned Jeni, Sachiko cared enough about him to ask our church family to lift him up in prayer. Based on the way Sachiko lived her life, I have no doubt that she would still have asked for prayer on his behalf, even if she knew that he would eventually take her life and cause her family so much pain.
The pain is still very raw, and without closure, it seems like each day that passes is pouring more salt into this horrendous wound. The only thing that is keeping me sane is knowing that no matter what the outcome of this story, God is still sovereign, He is still in control, and that He is with Sachiko. He has not (or did not) abandon Sachiko in her time of need, and He will not abandon us either. I pray that my life will be lived in such a way that it carries a legacy even 1/10 as great as Sachiko’s.